Wintry Forecast for Sunshine and Blue Skies Ahead....

Welcome to the winter white days of the depths of January in Missouri.  It's that special time of the year when soups taste the best, warm blankets seem like long-lost buddies, and the jarring ring of the alarm clock awakens us at what-must-be-midnight-because-it's-pitchblack-out-there...  I love it.  I had the brief twinge of hoping for early spring this morning when I cleared the deep frost off my car window and shivered into my old Taurus for another grey ride to school.

Spring sounds promising because it will bring the end of an era with me...  I have decided to retire this year.  It isn't one hundred percent official, and I haven't filed the papers.  I imagine some scenarios could change my mind, and I'm half excited, one quarter sad, and one-quarter thrilled...  I have been blessed by so many good students, parents, coworkers...  and the most fabulous family and friend support system imaginable.  I always think of the phrase, "It takes a village..." when my son comes over and digs my car out to get me to school...

Oh, I have a lot of plans and dreams available for after retirement...  I think it will be delightful to totally rearrange and clean, to create a space for a delicious business at Mom's, and to create an online store...  and to finally write something big, something either for my own soul or something to sell...

Change doesn't come easily to this girl, so it isn't surprising I have wrestled with this decision for nearly five years...  My friend told me she decided to retire a few years ago because "it just came to her she should."  I think that happened to me...  Sometimes a few nasty experiences make us stronger and we want to fight and claw our way in deep to prove we can...  At times such as these I believe it is smart to "get while the gettin's good," as my dear Gramma used to say.

The first time I retired was 12 years ago...  At that time I took my retirement papers, filled them out, and waited until I got ticked off to drop them in the mail.  Again, filled-out papers sit in my desk drawer, but I'm not waiting to be ticked off...  (If that were true, they'd be winging their way to Jefferson City as we speak!) I'm waiting to see if I can "make it" to the end of school...  Some days, I think no...  but I hope to be able to.  Health issues are a big part of the decision....  and there is, of course, a wicked witch in my fairy tale, as my dear friend Cielo has in her life...
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I want to take better care of my mother.  She is so good to me.  I'm dreaming of going into business with my son in some form (although that is all very sketchy and mostly my dream, so I will definitely see what he's dreaming first!  hahaha....)

I am here at my desk with some beautiful plans to teach my dearest favorite classics and novels one last time.  Maybe I shouldn't dwell on the last time part, huh?

Have a cozy winter...