Saturday, June 15, 2013

Happy to Help... That was Daddy...


This is Father's Day weekend.  We have no living fathers, grandfathers, uncles in our family, so we have no one to spoil or pamper...  The holiday looms quite sad because it brings the memory of better times...  However, I am so grateful to have been a part of the lives of my daddy, uncles, grandfathers...

I have been dreaming about Daddy since I retired...  Dreaming more anyway because I am more rested...  I absolutely adore to dream about him or Gramma...  Or anyone like that who has gone on...  I awaken in a sweet, grateful reverence to have been allowed a "little visit" with a loved one now apart...

I have posted often about Daddy...  I was thinking this morning about his servant heart..  My father adored helping people.  It made him joyful to be able to do things for others...  Not just family, but neighbors, strangers, friends...  And especially me, of course!  ;-)

No one died in the circle of family or friends or neighbors that Daddy didn't go sod the grave...  A lost art, perhaps, because ironically we couldn't find anyone who knew how to do that for his.  He loved to show up early the day of a sale and help carry out things for a farm or estate auction.  Visiting rest homes with a little sack of Casey's doughnuts or cookies made him smile all over...  He happily awoke every winter morning I can remember to drive up to my house, shovel me a path to my car and clean off the windows before starting my vehicle to warm.   Then he'd disappear before his oh, so spoiled daughter managed to slither out to go to school... He never once sighed with resignation at the thought of taking his Amish friends to the doctor, or on errands to other communities...  He was happy to do things for others... Not waiting for paybacks or accepting payment...  I don't recall that he ever complained or even noticed if someone decided to kind of take advantage of his kindness.... Reciprocation was never his goal...  Or praise...  It just made him feel good.

I used to be like that...  For probably forty years, I enjoyed that very same thing...   And then I got burned at school. Criticized for a volunteer job...  Warned about being a fool for giving away my work...  Publicly bawled out a time or two for something I had been doing for free that could have gone better... Cheated out of some compensation given to others for doing the same job I did.....  I began to believe I was being used, taken advantage of...  disrespected, even...  It got easier to just avoid helping very many people...  Then I grew bitter...  I forgot the joy...  I started to count tit for tat in the work world, and I started to feel I came up short time after time.....  I grew to be on the ever-constant guard for criticism...  I lost the happiness...

In honor of my dad, I want to work toward reclaiming that servant heart so blessed in scriptures...  Not looking to be rewarded, thanked, noticed...  Just joyful to do it...

Happy Father's Day to my Dad, my grandfathers, and to all your sweet daddies everywhere...

1 comment:

Becky K. said...

Your Dad's selflessness is a rare thing in this world. You are right to have treasured that quality.
It is easy to get caught up in the world's thinking on service/giving.
Oh so easy.