Tuesday, October 2, 2012

My Personal Cinderella

With much flair and advertisement, Disney released today the Blue-Ray version of its masterpiece,Cinderella...  I wanted to buy it every time I saw that ad...  I don't own a Blue Ray player, but I have always adored Cinderella...  From the earlier reading of the story in a Little Golden Book to the Disney classic released when I was a little girl...  to a television version starring Leslie Ann Warren who sang, "In my own little corner; in my own little chair, I can be whatever I want to be." --  I have been smitten with the tale of the little cinders girl who became a princess.  I loved the Drew Barrymore version, Ever After, and I once taught a beautiful Cinderella unit with great surprise at the number of international versions available on Amazon.

I was and am the original Cinderella ..  I hope you all know this as it is for certain! I have been that mystical princess all my life, puttering away in the ashes and grime of ordinary, everyday "stuff"..  yet drawn to the sparkle and glitter of the fanciful.  I have grown to favor the Fairy Godmother just a bit too much in my later years, and I hope to do something about that.  The Disney Godmother looked almost exactly like my own grandmother, who did her best to perform any and all magic required of her fairy granddaughter.  If I needed a new dress,Gramma's magic fingers flashed, and one appeared on her sewing machine in a few days.  She had a basic pattern I adored, and she made so many variations I was able to always sail around the school feeling quite on top of any fashion crisis.  I loved those dresses, and I loved being the princess of her life.

The lovely little Cinderella statue in this blog is one purchased years ago.  Probably my sweet mama bought her for me.  She doesn't agree with the Cinderella factor.....  but she tries...  Unfortunately, my statue's little foot broke off in anticipation of that beautifully magic slipper, I guess...  I think, ironically, I dropped the sweeper handle on her...  a simple, homespun task gone bad, eh?  I had stationed her in my kitchen at HOME, and I had a little corner just for reading, sipping hot coffee, and being a kitchen Cinderella...  No such corner exists where I am now, but no matter...  I have that other one, still...  locked in my mind and ready to welcome me any moment I choose to travel back in time to that other life.

Autumn brings with it all the pageantry and color of magic.  How can trees so deprived of all good things this summer come forth with another blessing of radiant, crimson color?  I am enchanted by the mists of morning as they cling to each branch along my drive to school.  Last year I stopped along the way and took pictures...  and then I was late....  and then I met the "stepmother" who had me sign in and lose fifteen minutes pay....  But....I really love those pictures....  haha...

Do you ever wonder about Cinderella as an old woman?  Do you think she managed to keep that beauty, that pure and honest kindness for all the little animals and creatures in her world after she became queen of the land?  I think so, of course... I think she was a magical mommy and an absolutely scrumptious Gramma.....  You see, I would rather do an awful lot of imagining rather than face any kind of ugly truth.... I was once called "Cinderella of the ...xxx...."  (not a nice part of the anatomy)---  by a young man who simply wanted me to pull my weight with the reality of living in this world....  He didn't mean it in a very kind way, ... but I think I actually thought it was a compliment....  Today, even this week.... I am often called a fool, to my face----- for the way I view the world, the future...  everything....

So, to be more in sync with my coworkers,  I approach this magical world in cloaked behaviors...  one for all to see, and one to keep for myself....     A bit with my closest friends and sometimes my family, I am available to be their co traveler into the land of "Hope for the Best."  By doing so....  I am afraid I often seem glum to a few...  But be so very sure.... I am never really glum at my core....   At the base, I am truly and honestly a pool of sparkling glitter....  magical and mysterious...  I allow my soul to live near that pool...  If I let her leave that perpetual inner land of unwavering optimism--- even for a moment, I would feel too forlorn.  I would be forced to begin the keening an Irish moan that will never stop...  Occasionally I do creep to the edges of the world of REALITY...  I don't like it much. Yep, the world is messed up....  So what...  Those who "deal with reality" are never correct in their predictions...  Realism seems to be wrong about as often as I am actually, and all the days are ruined when we spend them "accepting reality"...  There will be only one day, one hour really, when each individual, "bad thing" will happen..  My dad passed away on one August morning...  one hour....  and he spent his whole life believing he would live forever, I think...  My Gramma left this world on a November afternoon, hooked up  to a myriad of life supports....  and don't you know, that August before.... she never ever whispered to me it would be her last garden...  Why do I ever ruin even a minute of the "now" with fears of the "then"?

What in the world has got into me today?  I am at school, and I am caught up somewhat with grading...  my second hour girls will come in and begin their work with laughter and chat...  I need to come back to the semi-ordinary life of teaching and feel the magic settle back down inside me to await a later resurgence....  I feel I was cut out for something truly wonderful.  Is this it?  My life has been truly blessed...  but am I living up to the Princess potential?  That ---- remains to be seen...  Bibbity, Bobbity, Boo......


1 comment:

Dewena Callis said...

I don't know whether you'll see a comment this old but I had to say how much I enjoyed this post. I hope you always keep the magic expressed in this and the few other posts I've read here since discovering you. You remind me of my dear daughter. Her ex-husband used to tell her to come down off her ferris wheel and she replied that she never would. She eventually divorced him and has gone on to find happiness with someone who shares her joy in life.

You have a unique blog. I'm enjoying it so much.